It's not always easy when we feel that we are somehow being treated badly for no reason. When we feel that life is not fair and the world seems unjust. But I hold on to the truth that I know. For he has been faithful, honest and true. It is simply that God really does have a plan for me...they are plans to prosper me, not harm me, plans to give me hope and a future.
I put my burdens at his feet...and he releases me.
Thursday, 19 May 2011
Each time you ignore me the wound goes deeper still.
What do you see when you look at me? Do you see past the shell that hides a complex swirling vortex of emotions all screaming to be heard, and yet too scared to be seen. Do you see the tear stains that run down my cheeks, the blood red veins covering my eyes. Do you hear the sigh, that with every breathe I take, leaves my lips, as words can no longer express the depth of my pain.
And why do I allow myself to let this happen. Why do I not say STOP! Oh wait, I did yell STOP! you just didn't listen. So how do I make myself heard? I really do need to toughen up!
What do you see when you look at me? Do you see past the shell that hides a complex swirling vortex of emotions all screaming to be heard, and yet too scared to be seen. Do you see the tear stains that run down my cheeks, the blood red veins covering my eyes. Do you hear the sigh, that with every breathe I take, leaves my lips, as words can no longer express the depth of my pain.
And why do I allow myself to let this happen. Why do I not say STOP! Oh wait, I did yell STOP! you just didn't listen. So how do I make myself heard? I really do need to toughen up!
Wednesday, 18 May 2011
When your strange!
Strange how things work sometimes. Just when you think that life cannot surprise you....
Trust is a funny thing. You decide in an instant who to trust, who not to trust. What makes us decide who is who? Today, I chose to trust somone new.
When did I become so couragous. Now you may not find it couragous, but truely for me it's a huge thing, learning to trust my instincts again. After so many years of being told that I everything was my fault. It dawned on me today that I had spent about 27 years of my life feeling guilty. That everything was my fault..and I'm only 40!
Anyway, I'm off to bed now, feeling more relaxed than I have done in ages.
Anon
Trust is a funny thing. You decide in an instant who to trust, who not to trust. What makes us decide who is who? Today, I chose to trust somone new.
When did I become so couragous. Now you may not find it couragous, but truely for me it's a huge thing, learning to trust my instincts again. After so many years of being told that I everything was my fault. It dawned on me today that I had spent about 27 years of my life feeling guilty. That everything was my fault..and I'm only 40!
Anyway, I'm off to bed now, feeling more relaxed than I have done in ages.
Anon
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